What Marriage Is All About...
By Neeraj ShindePune, India
http://shindeneeraj.blogspot.com/
Spinsterhood and bachelorhood is probably the age when you are neither a girl nor a woman, neither a boy nor a man in the complete sense. On the contrary, this is a time in the lifetime when real important decisions are made including the one with whom you are gonna settle down for the rest of your life. People give mixed reactions about marriage, a majority of them think it as a surrender of liberty, a sudden addition to their responsiblities and a surrender of the personal space. A many of the lone ones often think of the opposite sex a majority of time yet confused enough to take some candid decisions. I say, such minds are still in the state of evolution and their confusion is very much linked to their state of being single or rather to the pros of being single - that they have been enjoying since years. Nonetheless, this is not the only reason why people fear getting married; financial stability and finding the partner of preferance also adds to them. Often individuals are found in a dilemma and get haunted by the uncertainties of the decisions they would be making. Will I be getting a better option than this one!, will I be happy with him or her!, Is it the right time!, Should I wait for a year or some - Believe me if you are phobic to questions of this sort, then believe me Marriage should not be on your mind. Or just making it simple, it is not the right time yet. In almost any given scenario, trust forms the basis of a successful relationship and once it has been realized, love is the by-product. For the ones who have objections to this statement, I do not really want to enter into a debate. People with a converse belief may please continue believing so - I am fine as long as your belief keeps you remain happy with your relationships. But I strongly believe that love is a feeling that keeps on getting stronger when two souls stay together. Under no circumstances, it is born at first sight and neither in the subsequent meets. Nonetheless, infatuations do and a majority of them term it as love. It is just that you have met a partner of preferances whom you like and adore. Certainly, it takes lot more than this to get into this bondage.
It's far smoother to sail in the boat at times of ease and happiness. It's only during the not so easy conditions when relationships grow stronger. There's probably no better time than the times of pain, misery and sadness when you need a real quality companion. Although it is never too hard to find one during the good times - in fact you could find plenty of them. It's not that best friends cannot support you during your times of pain. Its just that you need a special support to rely upon - the one before whom you could relentlessly speak your heart, the one who could not only understand you but also the inner-self of you, your soul. This is the feeling that would fetch you something which all unmarried ones are longing for. And this is what being happy means to me. The world keep on finding ways towards happiness, but the ones who realize this would agree to the fact that there really aren't any ways towards being happy - its just that happiness itself is the way towards leading a good life. Every phase of life do has its own charm in the very own way as being single. Days go by and so do years of your life leaving behind your experiences with it. Being single would definitely fetch you a feeling of gratitude towards your current state of life just as being a child did to you a few years back. Time comes when you feel like living for others and find satisfaction in sharing and sacrifice. That is the essence of true love.
Marriage is all about sharing and caring for each other. If you are not ready to share and if you are not ready to care for others better stay away from this - for time being or probably, until you are ready. It is an amalgam of egoistic ideas, unexpected disputes, differences of opinions and interests. In a true sense, there is a lot of human factor associated to it which at times could be a hurdle to the strongest of the strong relationships. The greatness lies with the one who is ready to agree upon something that is kinda not preferable. People who love, do care for their mate and over a period of time would not agree upon something his partner dislikes. But the most important part is that they hardly build any expectations and if they do, its not really affection. Although you try being perfect all the time, it is ideally difficult to evade clashes. They might sound cumbersome but in fact they are the vital part of the relationship. As long as they are kept within a room, they form a crucial component for building a successful marriage. Nevertheless, it is all about what you give to your partner rather than what you expect out. Definitely, its not so easy to refer oneself as a 'better' half. At the end of the day, its undeniably true that the feeling to be owned by someone, cared and loved is incomparable to anything else in this world.
It's been 6 months for our marriage today and its not really 6 months older, rather 6 months stronger.
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I am impressed by your selection of topics and the way of putting across your point of view.There is no dearth of subjects but one should consciously write on a topic which can in some way touch one's heart.And what you are doing at this age is worth emulating by other aspiring writers.
ReplyDeleteThank you Ayyangar sir! I'm touched by your comments! Glad that you like my writings!
ReplyDeleteDear shinde,
ReplyDeleteCongratulations for being rated among the top 10 best indian blogs. You are doing a great work. May your blog reach to first place and u do top above our expectations.
God Bless u
Hanfee Sir IPSwale Bhaijaan
//It's only during the not so easy conditions when relationships grow stronger.//
ReplyDeleteVery well said mate! Taking a bow!!
Its going to be anniversary soon :) my hearty wishes to the couple and you two look lovely together, and so young I am going to complain for child marriage LOL
Thanks a lot Srivats for your wishes! We are waiting for the 11th! :)
ReplyDeleteBest Wishes, Neeraj. I like your blog :)
ReplyDeleteTouched my heart, dude!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you for sure...
Nice post
Touched my heart, dude!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you for sure...
Nice post